And when he is old he will not depart from it."
Oh my...if only these words were so EASY to do...sigh.... I'm finally sitting down to pen what have been emotions of frustration, anger, wonder, shaking-my-head, a raised-voice, discipline, and talking-to my children for the last 4 days. Let's face it: TRAINING IS NOT EASY! Right?!
Ugh...and I am so weary in emotion and mind...I've contemplated walking out the door a few times; Dreaming of where I would fly to - Massachusetts, upstate New York, Maine - (across the U.S.) to get a break from this 24/7/365 life that I'm living right now. You'd think the nicer I treated them, the more I give them, the more I make them laugh, the funner I am to them - that they would actually listen and obey my voice and do as I ask THE FIRST TIME, RIGHT?!.... Nope...I'm not right. ;)
Last night, our son was so tired from the days activities that he fell asleep early at bedtime. As my husband and I were getting ready for bed a few hours later, we suddenly heard that feint cry that parents hear. (Our ears "perk up", we 'shush' each other, and strain our listeners to see if it really is our child, or just noise from outside or the radio.) Indeed, yes it was our son, crying. I rushed downstairs, as I figured he had awoken suddenly and not realized where he was (as he was sleeping on the couch, not his bed). As I opened the door to his room, he grabbed my leg and I bent down to put my arms around him and pick him up into a big hug. I carried him back to the couch, laid him down, and asked if he would like me to cuddle with him for a few minutes. In his tired state of mind, he simply nodded his head, eyes shut in the early stages of slumber once more.
I laid down on the couch beside him, stroked his spiky blonde hair, kissed those soft, pink cheeks that all mothers love to kiss!...and heard God say to me:
"Teach and train My son up...for he may not be here tomorrow...."
"Teach and train My son up...for YOU may not be here tomorrow...."
(Insert tears) ...yes. Our children may not be on this Earth tomorrow...and/or I may not be here tomorrow. "God, I so need your voice to guide me as I try-try-try to be a mother and wife who shows your Grace and Love and Mercy and Forgiveness and Compassion and Joy to my family each day! Your words of wisdom from the Scriptures come back to me because My Parents trained Me up in the way I should go; and even when I'm flirting with sin, Your words do not depart from my mind and heart. God, give me wisdom, give me understanding for their actions, guide my mind to discipline in the right way, and "Thank You" over and over again for blessing our family with two beautiful, fun, energetic children who love You and are growing in Your knowledge each and every day! Lord, I'm grateful!"
Your daughter, who is trying....
- lynn. :)